You don't have to do this alone.
"The quality of your relationships determines the quality of your life."
- Nedra Twabb
We have more access to each other than ever before.
Why are we so damn lonely?
So many of us are walking through life without the support we need as humans.
It's not because:
we're never going to fit in.
no one really cares.
we're not worth attention.
we're on our phones too much.
It's because intimacy is fucking terrifying. It's can be painful. It's an unknown.
Connection is everything.
Even in our physical body, lack of community can cause...
2x Risk of Death
Even among adults with coronary artery disease, isolated adults had a risk of cardiac death over 2x greater than their more socially connected peers. (Brummett and colleagues, 2001)(Berkman and Syme, 1979)
Higher Health Risk
high blood pressure
smoking 15 cigarettes a day
being an alcoholic
Isolation is just as bad for our health as..
And those are just physical outcomes!
Isolation wreaks absolute havoc on our mental state and sense of wellbeing, and we don’t need studies to tell us that (although there are plenty).
Don't believe us? Check out this awesome TEDtalk by Susan Pinker.
Here's what most of us tell ourselves:
Everyone's fine but me. There must be something wrong with me. No one else feels this way.
And that's the question:
Is it just us?
How many of us are terrified to be honest about things that hurt? Our struggles? Our finances? Our parenting? Our fuck-ups? Even our wins, or things we’re really good at?
Most of us can’t fathom real, supportive conversations as the norm. Even if we could be assured that love and understanding made up 95% of the outcome, we would still grit our teeth for the conversation because…that 5% though.
Why? Why is it so hard to be real? Like, seriously. We’re not even talking about deep, dark secrets. We’re talking about, “I yelled at my kid last week,” or, “I was disappointed about the apartment.” A simple statement like, “Yeah, I’m not doing so hot right now.” Why on god’s green earth is that so hard (terrifying) to admit?
The more people we meet, the more stories we hear, the more we’re convinced that everyone – everyone – is going through stuff. No exceptions. Some of us are trying to handle trauma, and some of us are trying to cope with success. None of us have all of our plates spinning perfectly in balance at any given moment, never letting any wobble and fall. And even if we did, fate has a way of switching things up on us eventually.
That’s just life. That’s the journey. We explore, we get hurt, we win big, and we grow.
This movement is a place
to let our walls down.
No hidden agendas. No pitches, preachers, or pledges. Just supporting others and allowing them to support us. We're building relationships with people who know us and genuinely care about us.
Our goal is to make
connection a little easier
– a tad less scary.
Why "The Raft?"
We practice empathy in community, via a simple (not necessarily easy) framework, and facilitate safe environments for belonging. It may be through digital meetings, retreats, conferences, our online community, or media, but we’re making sure no one goes under.
Connection does amazing
things for our health.
(physical and mental)
50% increased chance of longevity – greater empathy, more trust and cooperation, and higher self esteem.
(House J, Landis K, Umberson D | Cole, S)
e.g., reduced blood pressure, heart rate, and stress hormones that help us mitigate risky behavior (Uchino 2006)
Ready to connect?
If you're the "jump right in" type, join our online community! It's the quickest way to get support (and start supporting others) – we'd love to have you.
If this way of thinking is new to you, and you're a studier, or you just want to know more of what we're about...grab our book.
Still trying to get a feel for The Raft Project?
Learn more About Us
Be a part of the journey that brought us here, and see where we're hoping to do in the world.
Follow us on social
Kayla and Andy will change the way we exist as humans. The framework of The Raft Project is how we level up as humans and reconnect. Speaking with them and engaging with The Raft Project is like getting a Master Class in communications and empathy.
- Aislinn E.